“To unite your physical lives, your material interests, to become partners in order to face together the difficulties and successes, the defeats and victories of life—that is the very foundation of marriage, but you already know that it is not enough.
To be united in your sensations, to have the same aesthetic tastes and enjoyments, to be moved in common by the same things, one through the other and one for the other—that is good, that is necessary, but it is not enough.
To be one in your deeper feelings, to keep a mutual affection and tenderness that never vary in spite of all the blows of life and can withstand every weariness and irritation and disappointment, to be always and on every occasion happy, extremely happy, to be together, to find in every circumstance tranquility, peace and joy in each other—that is good, that is very good, that is indispensable, but it is not enough.
To unite your minds, to harmonise your thoughts and make them complementary, to share your intellectual preoccupations and discoveries; in short, to make your sphere of mental activity identical through a widening and enrichment acquired by both at once—that is good, that is absolutely necessary, but it is not enough.
Beyond all that, in the depths, at the centre, at the summit of the being, there is a Supreme Truth of being, an Eternal Light, independent of all the circumstances of birth, country, environment, education; That is the origin, cause and master of our spiritual development; it is That which gives a permanent direction to our lives; it is That which determines our destinies; it is in the consciousness of That that you must unite. To be one in aspiration and ascension, to move forward at the same pace on the same spiritual path, that is the secret of a lasting union.
I write this to both of you, since you are about to marry with the aim of becoming one being in two bodies.”
The Mother, New Words of the Mother
Collected Works of the Mother Vol. 20
INSIGHTS
Love is a primary ingredient parents can give to the child to be born. Now love is a mystery that all seek and it often eludes us. Read the above quote from time to time as a couple. Aspire, connect, bond, allow natural intimacy and love so that slowly you experience union in your body’s subtle substance, sensations, feelings, emotions, thoughts, deeper aspiration and connection to Divine. This is a joyful labour of mutual love. The more closer experientially we arrive at this as a couple the more the child to be born is soaked in an inner space of love, peace, warmth and creative flow.
The basis of union is first of all to become an individual, to function from your highest and deeper self. And then when both the individuals are striving to be in their height, then the union more naturally takes place. A clash of mother and father when they are giving their best form of love will not occur if they are at a height. From their height they will always connect to themselves and each other from the real essence of care, love and parenthood. Even when difference of opinions comes they can remain connected to the true essence of love and then finding a way out is easy. Union is possible more only form an individual height and depth. By union, it does not mean that the couple is merging and dissolving into something. They are standing straight and firm. The firmness is not stubbornness. And yet they are melting and moulding into and with each other. True individuation is the basis of true Union. Then surrendering to the highest destiny of the child or the relationship is possible.